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My Nurse Recruiter  |  General Interest Forums  |  Nurse Discussion  |  Topic: You know you're a nurse if.. « previous next »
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kelley_mc
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« on: June 04, 2007, 10:16:52 »

You would like to meet the inventor of the call light some night in a dark alley.

Your sense of humor gets more warped each year.

Almost everything can seem humorous...eventually.

You know the smell of different diarrhea to identify it.

You wash your hands BEFORE you use the bathroom.

You check the caller ID on your day off to see if anyone from the hospital is trying to call and ask you to work.

Discussing bodily fluids over a gourmet meal seems perfectly normal to you.

You think that caffeine should be available in IV form.

You get an almost irresistible urge to stand and wolf  your food even in the nicest restaurants.

You believe that unspeakable evils will befall you if you say,"It's unusually quiet around here today"

You have ever had a patient look you straight in the eye and say "I have no idea how that got stuck in there".

You notice that you are using more 4 letter words than you even knew before you started nursing.

Every time someone asks you for a pen you can find at least 4 of them on you .

You live by the motto "to be right is only half the battle, to convince the doctor is more difficult."

You've told a confused patient that your name was that of your coworker and to holler if they need help.
 
Your bladder can expand to the size of a winnebago's water tank.

You find yourself checking out other customer's veins in grocery waiting lines.

You avoid unhealthy looking shoppers in the mall for fear that they will drop near you and you'll have to do CPR on your day off.

Your finger has gone places you never thought possible.

Feel free to add to the list!  Wink
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MyNurseRecruiter
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WWW
« Reply #1 on: January 29, 2008, 01:33:26 »

> The
>  Front of your scrubs reads "Nurses: here to
> save your _____, not kiss
> it!"
>   
> You occasionally park in the space with the
> "physicians only" sign, and
> knock it over.
>   
> You believe some patients are alive only
> because it's illegal to kill
> them.
>   
> You recognize that you can't cure stupid.
>   
> You own at least three pens with the names of
> prescription medications
> on them.
>   
> You believe there's a special place in hell for
> the inventor of the call
> light.
>   
> You believe that saying "It can't get any
> worse" causes it to get worse
> just to show you it can.
>   
> You wash your hands BEFORE you go to the
> bathroom.
>   
> You believe that any job where you can drive to
> work in your pajamas is
> a cool one.
>   
> You consider a tongue depressor an eating
> utensil.
>   
> Eating microwave popcorn out of a clean bedpan
> is perfectly natural.
>   
> You've been exposed to so many x-rays that you
> consider it a form of
> birth control.
>   
> You've ever heard a patient with a nose ring, a
> brow ring, and twelve
> earrings say "I'm afraid of shots."
>   
> You've ever placed a bet on someone's blood
> alcohol level.
>   
> You've told a confused patient that your name
> is that of a coworker and
> to call if they need help.
>   
> Your bladder can expand to the size of a
> Winnebago's water tank.
>   
> You have seen more penises than any prostitute
> could dream of.
>   
> You believe that not all patients are annoying,
> some are unconscious.
>   
> Your family and friends refuse to watch medical
> sitcoms with you because
> you spend the whole time correcting everyone
> and pointing out upside
> down x-rays.
>   
> You don't get excited about blood, unless it's
> your own.
>   
> You've sworn to have "Do not resuscitate"
> tattooed on your chest. Soon.
>   
> Discussing dismemberment over a gourmet meal is
> perfectly normal to you.
>
>   
> Your idea of fine dining is anywhere you can
> sit down to eat.
>   
> Your idea of a good time is a cardiac arrest at
> shift change.
>   
> You believe in the aerial spraying of Prozac.
>   
> You believe that "shallow gene pool" should be
> a recognized diagnosis.
>   
> You believe that the government should require
> permits to reproduce.
>   
> You believe that unspeakable evils will befall
> anyone who utters the
> phrase "Wow, it's really quiet, isn't it?"
>
>   
> You have ever wanted to write a book entitled
> "Suicide: getting it right
> the first time."
>   
> You have ever had a patient look you straight
> in the eye and say "I have
> no idea how that got stuck in there."
>   
> You have ever had to leave a patient's room
> before you begin to laugh
> uncontrollably.
>
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